20 April 2015

Bizarrely Beautiful: Wondrously Weird Beauty Hacks


Whether you like to admit it or not, we all have them! I'm talking about our secret bizarre beauty habits! It's the tweak you do with the edge of your old toothbrush that gets your eyebrows looking razor sharp like a Delvigne, the way you apply your taupe eyeshadow that has you looking hot hot hot like the Sahara desert...all these little quirks make for our bizarrely beautiful finished product! They may be weird and wonderful and certainly something you'd rather keep concealed like your MAC long pro-wear but the truth is they're actually bloomin' brilliant!

Pepped your curiosity? Mine too! Time to pull our hidden coveted secrets out of our beauty handbags and celebrate them in all their glorious oddities...

Hoarding broken/smashed/smudged palettes

Yes ok I know there's roughly an inch of usable glittery shadow left in the empty palette but you may just need it for that one special occasion, right? It could be the finishing touch you need to nail that killer date look so you shan't be parting with the broken empty any time soon thank you very much...even if it's been waiting for its home-glory moment for the past 6 months already!

Skimping on the real deal for its free tester pots

Why splash the cash on a full-sized bottle and spend the rest of the month sobbing over lettuce leaves when you can bag yourself a couple of free tester sachets from magazines and charm your way into freebies from the beauty counters? It may add an extra couple of minutes to your morning routine as you painstakingly muster every last damn morsel out of the packet but at least you'll look fabulous and still be able to afford your Sainsbury's basics baked beans...#winning.


Fervently ignoring expiration dates

Anyone else find that your mascara suddenly becomes a tube of wondrous gold dust as it hurtles towards the 8 month open-mark and is starting to show signs of a weary life? Mascara is that one pesky little morsel that always seem to unearth its shining glory just as we're faced with the ultimatum of choosing between lust-worthy bambi lashes or a less-than-pretty case of the yellow sticky eyes. Hello gorgeous! Either way you're going to be eye-catching so I guess it's a win-win situation after all!

Lubing up the eyes

Ok this one sounds beyond bonkers but it's actually a pretty nifty little habit to steal and whittle away into your bank of beauty secrets! Grabbing any sort of lubricating ointment such as Lucas paw paw or Elizabeth eight hour skin protectant and sweeping it across the lids allows for a refreshed and bright-eyed look without the heaviness and hassle of eyeshadow contouring. Quick, simple, easy and guaranteed to make for some hydrating and summer fresh pretty peepers.


The Minx effect

Hailed as the understated grooming range for men but where's the fun in that? I refuse to believe that I'm the only one who can't resist reaching for the boys much-loved lynx range! They just smell too.damn.fine. I have to admit part of the reason is that I'm immediately attracted to boys regardless of whether they're sporting chin beavers or not when wearing a swipe of the good stuff so I figured I must be that irresistible too when sporting the spicy aromas. 
C'mon admit it, the best bet for us girls is powder fresh whiffs and what lady of seductive sass wants to smell like a baby's butt? Give me the throaty scents of lynx that last all day long and ultimately bring all the boys to the yard...It's a hard life sometimes.

Nips out, heels shout!

Can anyone take a guess where I'm heading with this one? Probably not! Got some McNasty cracks and unsightly skin lurking on the soles of your feet? To help treat the troublesome woes of icky tootsies, whip out your nips and you'll be a silky smooth mama in next to no time. Keep your heads clean ladies, I'm talking nipple cream! 
Cheap as chips, available just about everywhere and one hell of a saviour in kissing goodbye to your bothersome winter skin! By all means get your nips out too but I can assure you they'll get you far more attention than your cracked heels ever would!


Haemorrhoid cream to get rid of your eye bags

Still trying to convince yourself that the only bags you own are Chanel? Leave those fanciful dreams in la-la land ladies and crack down on your unsightly black rings by whipping out a trusty tube of haemorrhoid cream. A beauty habit best kept under wraps and not drunkenly blurted out at your next family reunion, this trusty little cream is said to help shrink any enlarged capillaries around your less-than-perky puffy peepers, reducing the appearance of your designer bags! Approach with caution though as the skin around our eyes can be a sensitive ole' soul at the best of times! 

Keep it clear with cider

Extra motivation to get on the beers? Oh go on then you cheeky scamp! A celebrity secret to keep your skin crystal clear, delicately smooth and enviably glowing is to cleanse your face with that bottle of apple cider vinegar lurking at the back of your kitchen cupboard. A little bit rough and tumble for those with sensitive skin but an excellent healing toner for the rest of us battling the woes of temperamental skin!


Wake up with caffeine

Before you roll your eyes and scoff at the obvious here, I'm talking about waking up those lazy dormant skin cells causing an unsightly performance on the back of your thighs. Sounds odd but adding a scoop of loose ground coffee into your daily morning scrub will help to buff your way to silky smooth skin and increase the blood flow to your pins. Anything to help morph me a little more into Candice Swaneopoel and I'm sold!

Pump it up

Hankering for your own share of Kylie Jenner's peachy pout? A beauty tip I've plucked from the perky lips of beauty cupboard insiders is to add a few drops of peppermint oil to your favourite lip gloss. Mint is known for its invigorating qualities and when applied to your pout, helps to stimulate blood flow tickling the nerves and leaving you with a bee-stung set of lips. How swell!


Got any more oddly creative beauty hacks to throw into the mix? Drop me a comment below as I'd love to add to my ever-growing bag of happy habits!

[Photo source Inspiration: Pinterest]
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