27 August 2015

Salmon Swimming In The Rain

Well my oh my what do we have here? It's raining, it's pouring, and ThePoachedSalmon is bloody well mourning! Needless to say the rain and I are not cushty friends. 

A right who-har is going down outside and don't we all freakin' know it...Whoever upset the big man upstairs better be squirming in utter shame and hopefully drenched right through so that they're ringing out their quivering locks until Monday swings about. 

This little fishy has been stuck indoors most of the day twiddling her fins so instead of wallowing in misery at the current outdoor state, I figured I would try my hand at being somewhat productive and whittle away a few hours doing another question survey and enlighten you folk with a few more home truths. Oh I know, my generosity is too much sometimes! 

So go grab yourself a steamin' cup o'Joe, a cheeky handful of choccie biccies, pop your feet up and jump on into the fun-filled life of yours truly...

(1). What Brings You The Most Joy? Woah this survey is certainly easing me in gently here with the easy questions! Golly...probably seeing my parents laugh and joke together and just seeing pure, genuine happiness and passion in the people I love. 

(2). What Are Your Vices? Magazines, my laptop, makeup, clothes...materialistic isn't a common word used to describe me I'll have you know. Wait would the right hand section of the Daily Mail online count as a vice? Answers truly welcome. 

(3). What's On Your Nightstand? A Moroccan lampshade, blistex lip balm, M&S rhubarb hand cream, a red clock, my phone charger and 3 books: How to get a job in Publishing, The Chimp Paradox and a naughty novel...all consistently left unread! At least the intention's there eh?

(4). Do You Have A Secret Talent? Well to answer that would entail me actually having talent of some sort. Would my incapability to navigate life count?

(5). What Is Your Greatest Indulgence? Toiletries and skincare. The amount I spend in Boots probably keeps the bloody company afloat and booming. It also makes my bank balance cry. A lot.

(6). What Should Every Woman Try At Least Once In Her Life? Refuse to step foot in the kitchen. No in all seriousness I would say Ask someone out! It's such a cliche for the man to do all the wooing and schmoozing and yeah while the chances of rejection make your nipples stand loud n'proud, being bold and taking the risk just may lead to something totally unexpected and amazing! Risks can often pay-off big time! Quit wasting time conjuring up ways for the guy to notice you, whip on your big girl pants and jump into the deep end. You may just end the night jumping into more than you bargained for you scamp!

(7). What Makes You Laugh? What besides myself? Only joshing! Lee Evans, my dog Coco and being the immature child I am, anything fart-related. Even the word makes my lips twitch. Shameful!

(8). What's One Thing That People Would Be Surprised About You? Probably that I'm actually 6ft 1" but as I don't like to steal the show, I try to blend in at 5ft 1" by walking on my knees...it takes practise. No it would probably be that I spent quite a bit of my childhood living in the Caribbean. 

(9). One Thing On Your Bucket list? Spend the night in Channing Tatum's bed. Joking (marginally)...I'll settle for sleeping under the stars in a tree-top villa!

(10). What Is On Your Feet Right Now? Leather Hollister flip-flops. Hot to trot.

(11). What Superstition Do You Believe In? If you dare knock down that salt shaker you best already be slinging some over your shoulder buddy!

(12). What Did You Eat For Lunch? The entire contents of your ice-cream drawer. Someone's gonna be crying come dessert-time haha!

(13). Leggings Or Yoga Pants? Considering I don't even own a pair of yoga pants then I'll have to plump for leggings, though they're not an ideal leg covering at the best of times. They're just so...hugging. I don't bite but I'm a fish who likes to swim and wriggle...I need ma space dang it!

(14). What's The Best Gift You Have Received? The gift of Sarcasm...shout out to mum and dad! It would probably be my pale green stone ring from Pandora that I wear every single day without fail. Without it would be like heading on out without any pants on - uncomfortable and plain weird. 

(15). What Is On Your Liquor Shelf? Can you be more specific here as some of us have more than just the one in accordance to selected spirit organisation, geez. If I owned such a precious shelf it would definitely contain the only needed beverage a girl needs...Grey Goose Vodka. Or Sainsbury's basics I'm not picky. 

(16). What Is To Your Immediate Right? Sally Hansen mega shine top coat and a bottle of chilled water....Ya know, the essential stuff. 

(17). What Do You Never Leave Home Without? My phone and umbrella. Oh and knickers - at least I hope.

(18). What Was Your First Concert? Power in the Park at Southampton Common! Nothing beats a group of pubescent girls consisting of the eclectic mix of a hippie, a goth, a sk8r girl and one still dressed in what Mum selects at a Busted gig...take a wild guess at which one I was! Never has someone nailed a black fishnet sleeve top quite like this girl has!

(19). What Movie Has The Greatest Ending? The secret life of Sarah Salmon. Oh yeah, it's a good'un!

(20). What Is One Thing You Would Tell Your Younger Self? Chill. The. Hell. Out. Life is meant to be exciting so just live a lil' whilst it's all fun and games and freakin' enjoy it. Still telling myself this to date!

[Photo Source Inspiration: Personal, Pinterest]

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